“Situation ‘Y’ Triggered Feelings Of ‘X’ In Me” My clients are all too familiar with this intervention. It is an invitation to deliberately change their language in a straightforward, albeit slightly awkward, way. In this post, I argue that using this language (externally and internally) saves us from positioning ourselves as victims, and puts power …
Personal Empowerment Achieved Through a Shift in Language Read More »
Managing anxiety is no small feat, especially in the face of the uncertainty and fear resulting from COVID-19. This posts offers some tips in the form of drawings to help regulate anxiety and reconnect with self during this stressful time.
The majority of couples who come to therapy complain about a lack of connection in their relationship. They want to feel more engaged with one another. More intimate. Closer. As the therapist, buying into this narrative is enticing. The subsequent sessions are spent proposing solutions aimed at increasing the likelihood that the couple will experience …
The hero’s journey is symbolic of the path to transformative change. A hero confronts her own demise. Her own annihilation. In popular culture, this journey happens in the external world. The journey can be witnessed and commented upon. We see it in adventure, war, unfortunate circumstances, outside threats. The hero is put in a position …
If engaging in our desired behavior is dependent on us feeling good and feeling motivated, we are, in my estimation, doomed. So long as our behavior is chained to an experience of comfort, ease, and motivation, we can only go so far. Transformative change necessarily entails feeling uncomfortable.
Courage is not the absence of fear or anxiety. Courage is about showing up fully in our lives – taking action – even while feeling afraid and anxious. I imagine that you were drawn to this post due to your own history with anxiety. Indeed, it was my experience with anxiety that initially motivated me …
It is my observation that all of us, in some way or another and to varying degrees, display a certain amount of neurotic behavior in our engagement with life. We manage, time and again, to unnecessarily create difficult situations for ourselves. Probably all of us could win an award for “going out of my way …
To be close is not to be intimate. I can cuddle up to my dog, but that does not equate to intimacy. A mother is exceptionally close to her newborn, but, again, that does not imply an intimate relationship. These examples seem obvious, but most people I work with, and most people I talk to, automatically …
Abandonment is a catchy word. In the therapy world, you’ll often time see it preceding such words as: issues, problems, trauma, anxiety, ect. The basic story is: I had experiences of abandonment when I was young (some of these experiences may have even been preconscious) and now I live in constant fear of it happening …
1) Have the same conflict again and again without resolution 2) Hire your child(ren) to take your side against your partner 3) Have ineffective or, better yet, non-existent boundaries 4) Make your children your primary confidants 5) Keep secrets 6) Blame your partner and your children for not having the life you want 7) …
How to Make Sure your Kids Will Spend Years in Therapy as Adults Read More »
